


Get Down With The Sickness (You Can't See)

by Holy_Leonards_After_Dark (Holy_Leonards)



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Anal Sex, Belt Buckle, Crack, Enough of them, M/M, Marriage, Money Shot, Oral Sex, Orgy, fork, references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-07
Updated: 2016-06-07
Packaged: 2018-07-12 20:55:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7122268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holy_Leonards/pseuds/Holy_Leonards_After_Dark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick cures DiMA of his ailments.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Get Down With The Sickness (You Can't See)

“DiMA, you big virgin!”

DiMA's eyes widened, astonished at Valentine's abrasive statement. The two – well, Nick, really – had been arguing. Nick was uncomfortable with DiMA's existence or something. Geez, and Mom thinks _I_ reacted badly to getting a brother. “I am dainty, not big. I also have engaged in sexual acts many times. With ladies. Unlike you.”

“Are you saying I'm a virgin? You know, back west, they call me Long Dick Johnson.”

“No. Nick, I'm not an idiot. I know you're not a virgi-”

“Damn right. You've never gotten your wires wet.”

“:O” Once DiMA regained his composure, he gripped the detective's shoulders. “Nick, listen very carefully. I'm a ladies man. A ladies man. A la-la-la-la-ladies man.”

“?????” Nick added, “Geez, what has a century in Acadia done to you?”

“Acadia has pussy, Nick. Horse pussy, dog pussy... chicken pussy. For pussy-lovers, if Maine ain't got it, you don't want it!”

“Listen, you plastic surgery addict, I'm not gonna sit here and let you walk around with that face buried in some dame's secret garden.”

“I will never give up Great Dane pussy, Nick.”

Nick threw his hands up in exasterbation. Exasperation? Yeah, that. “Fine, taint my reputation.”

One of DiMA's light bulbs over his head lit up. “Nick, I know I'm sick. It's not the kind of sickness you can see, but it's just as deadly. I know my heterosexuality is disgusting. Maybe,” DiMA batted imaginary eyelashes. “Maybe we could cure it.”

Nick pulled away. “This ain't the kind of sickness you can fix, sweetheart.”

DiMA was already rubbing the bulge in Nick's pants. Nick said, “It isn't a magic wand.”

The detective eyed the other robot for a moment. “Alright, take off your pants and jacket.”

“Really?” Nate asked. “Really? What fucking year is it? Stop with these references. No one understands a thing you're saying!”

“Nate? You're here? And Codsworth?”

“This is the most massive demonstration of same-sex love in the whole history of mankind,” Nick said.

A Boston bugle flew through the air, hitting Nick on the nose. “Enough! No! No more references.”

Codsworth said, “Sir, all these things you're saying – these... things you've said. They're running through my head.”

“Codsworth, I swear to God I will throw you in the ocean.”

A single tear rolled over metal.

“Alright, everyone. Time to fix! DiMA! Up!”

The crowd cheered.

Nick quickly undid his belt and zipper. “Please, brother. Let me,” DiMA said, sliding the fabric off Nick's hips. “:O”

“Impressive, isn't it?” Between Nick's legs, the smoking gun. As in, a real gun, actually smoking.

“Oh! Wow, Nick... is that-”

“Yup! An authentic 1959 Mattel brand Derringer Belt Buckle.”

“The same one that blasted off thousands of foreskins.”

“Mhm.” Hands on his hips, Nick pelvic thrust, firing a toy bullet at DiMA's face. “There's the money shot.” He inserted the bullet back in, and repeated. “Oh, yeah!”

Nate said, “You sure you've never been with men before, DiMA?”

“Look!” DiMA backed dat ass up real nice. “Hymen, intact.” His face turned red. “Though, I have been known to experiment.”

“Experiment?” Codsworth asked.

“Here's a fork.”

Nick scratched his butt with the fork and then brought it to eye level.

“You know, DiMA, when I look into your ass I have tunnel vision.”

“Tunnel vision?”

“Tunnel vision.”

“Tunnel vision?”

“Tunnel vision.”

Nick gripped DiMA's dick and started rubbing.

“So, this goes where?”

“In my ear, Nick.”

Nate looked disgusted.

“You two are creeps.”

The two robots turned towards him.

“Loser says what?”

“What? Dammit!”

Nate stormed out. Codsworth remained, his three eyes fixed on DiMA's one rear eye.

“Here it goes, in the ear.”

Nick jammed it in and DiMA spit green venom from his penis.

“That was fast.”

“I can go all night.”

“They also call me Marissarim back south... it means penis suckle.”

Nick went down on DiMA and worked him until he got a mouthful of the venom. He could feel the mutated robot sperms wiggling around on his robot tonuge. He spit it out and DiMA looked kind of sad.

“The youth!”

“Can it, can, I can spit if I wanna!”

Nick then spun DiMA around and put it in the can's can that had been canned by the can ordering can. They went at it for days. Robots can have sex repeatedly for ever, but, they also require a lot of lube. That was something that was in short supply. When Nick finally decided to pull his rocket out of orbit, he discovered that it was no more than a thin rod.

“My rod!”

His cigarette fell out of his mouth in surprise.

“It is okay, Nick, we can build you another one. A bigger and better one!”

Nick put in his sad eyes.

“Nobody will ever want to marry me.”

“I do.”

Nick looked up and put in his loving eyes. The left one was giving him some trouble. A swift punch got it in place, but at a funny angle.

“You would?”

“I do.”

Codsworth pulled out a Bible.

“Jolly good show! I am qualified to marry robots, its n my programming.”

The two robots took hands and Codsworth got in front of them.

“0111101010110101010101101010011010101!”

They kissed and DiMA threw the bundle of books he picked up as a bouquet. They took each other's arms and skipped happily out of the dome both shouting, “I'm motha fuckin' gay married now!”

 


End file.
